The Last Bastion

It was a cool Saturday morning. It had the smell of fall even though all was green. I don't know how to describe the fall smell or what causes it, but the whole feel of life changes. The clouds were pregnant with moisture and seemed to almost scrape on the tree tops. Umbrellas were toted in anticipation and pricey gortex coats were preparing for their once a year dampening.

Through the drizzle they came. Single file. Heads erect. Impassive stares covered steely resolve and probably not a few nerves. Their shoes clattered over the pavement, and the crowd parted to make way for them. They walked with purpose and finality. Indecision was nowhere to be seen. They were men, and they knew it, and they knew this is what men do.

These were not marines or firemen. They were not policemen or construction workers. These were football players. And they weren't grown men, they were 8 and 9 year old boys. They looked like men as they came. I'm sure the football equipment added to the illusion, but only somewhat. They were men in process. At their age the foundation of who they will be as men is already laid. The question that remains is - will good flourish or be stifled?

Check out number 60

That depends on the story you live in.

Many "progressive" thinkers see little problem with current trends of infidelity, infertility, and gender chaos. To them gender should not determine anything beyond which public restroom to use, and I am sure that will be up for grabs soon. They see a better, more "equal" society evolving.

Reality, I would argue, is that as your men go, so goes your society.  Incent men not to work, and they won't work. Give men sexual pleasure without relational confusion and risk, and they will take it. Give men's roles to women and they will abdicate. In summary, give men a short-cut, and they will take it. Unfortunately, this erodes the essence of who they are meant to be. As they grab for leisure, easy sex, and irresponsibility, they become less and less manly.  This in turn defines your communities.

To see what this does to a community one need only look at our inner cities. The ratio of  men who don't work, father children out of wedlock and live irresponsible and too often violent lives is greatest in highly populated urban areas. They perpetuate a story of fatherless homes and fleeting self serving relationships. In turn, whole communities are laid to waste. Most social program fixes only increase incentive to irresponsible lifestyle and victim mentality. The decay of the city is an outward manifestation of the decay of men. The suburbs and rural communities are not immune, but the extent of the decay is much less. Unfortunately, the decay is increasing in all regions.

As Christ-followers what are we to do? Back to the men in the rain.

In the midst of an emasculated culture marched this team of 20 men-in-process. It struck me that I was seeing something very unique in our culture. Young men were allowed to be with men only and engage in controlled aggression for the sake of refining their skill and developing character traits of hard work, teamwork, perseverance, and brotherhood. Virtually all traditional bastions of brotherhood have been disallowed. All boys schools, clubs, and organizations have been neutered. The military, police and fire departments are all co-ed. I am sure even Spanky's "He-man Woman Haters Club" was forced by the Supreme Court to admit not only women but also transgendered little rascals.

Even Christian churches have failed to hold sway. National studies show that almost 70 percent of church ministry efforts are led by women and the number of churches holding to male only pastoral staffs is shrinking rapidly.

Let me be clear on what I am not saying. I am not saying that women aren't as capable and talented as men. But who tracks what happens to men as they are bumped out of roles that give definition to their manhood? And who takes the household roles left unattended while men and women chase significance in the marketplace? Schools, daycares, t.v., gangs and other peer groups?

I am not saying women must be barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. However, why is devoting oneself to building a healthy household always depicted as the short end of the deal. The myth that true significance only comes in the marketplace is a powerful lie that goes virtually unquestioned. The marketplace can be a liar who demands years from our livces while stealing our kids and wrecking our marriages.

I am also not saying every real man must play football, nor that football provides pure godly virtue. Real men can be artists, florists, doctors, professors, etc..... Additionally, too many communities see football success as an end and not a means to a deeper end. Consequently, something that can be deeply enriching is often destructive and unhealthy for player, family, and community.

What I am saying is there is something embodied in the sport that is sorely missing in many venues where it used to hold sway.  It is in its uniqueness that it offers a lesson for us to heed. Men must regain a sense of real manhood as shaped by the biblical narrative, and we must foster households and churches that breathe life into that story.

A biblical man sees those around him that he is to lead and breathes life into their gifts to help them grow and flourish. He does not abdicate. He makes and keeps promises. Fidelity is his mantle. He knows the boredom of life is a ruse meant to catch him asleep at his post. He fights it. He sees life in the mundane, light in the dark, and possibility in the improbable. He moves and Christ is the beacon by which he gauges his movement.

A godly man is resolved to knowing God's story and teaching it to family and people he mentors.

A godly man lives a life that makes the story believable.

He sees his household as the most vital sphere of his influence. His time, energy and investment reflect it.

He is sexually pure, fiscally responsible, and understands the power of community and covenant community.

He moves beyond his comfort and competence to connect relationally and extend care and mercy.

If he falls he gets back up. Failure saddens him, but does not keep him from trying anew.

Forgiveness is his calling card - because he knows he needs it more than you.

You don't need to play football to do any of this, but you must remember you're God's man.